I headed up to Hollywood last night to attend April Storm’s annual “Porn to Rock” birthday bash. Most of you already know that making the drive up for porn parties isn’t usually my thing. (Fayner is so good at it that I always feel like a lightweight.) However, this was one invitation I could not pass up. April has been such a great friend to me from day one that I can’t miss a special occasion for this special lady.

The party was held at the El Centro on Sunset and because the festivities started at 10 PM I actually made the drive in just about forty five minutes. I had the car parked and waited outside for my “date” for the evening, Maria Menendez of the KSEXRadio.com Porn Hunnies Top 20. Since Maria was running late, I waited in line to go inside without her. While on line, I was behind Nick East and a lovely blonde. Behind me was a group that included Mark Davis, Mickey G and two very beautiful young women. Oddly enough there was the porn critic in between these guys, sans women. (I wonder why.) I also got to watch as a middle aged dude pulled up to the corner of El Centro and Santa Monica to pick up a special friend. (No idea if said friend was a woman or a man, but based on the location of the pick up I would bet money that ‘she’ was probably packing a bulge under that short skirt.)

As luck would have it, I got to the front of the line just as the birthday girl herself arrived. I was ushered in with VIP party and apparently just missed being introduced to April’s mom. (A very beautiful woman as well by the way.) Once inside I gave the room and patio a quick once over. Never comfortable at places like this, I sought out someone that I knew. (And a beer.) Maria gave me a call to let me know that she had been turned away at the door. Sadly she is not yet twenty-one and the bar wouldn’t let her in. I did promise to “rub up against the girlies” for her. Now truly dateless, I wandered around a bit before running into super PR rep Carly Milne. We go way back to the old eyada days when I would follow her toy reviews on the Love Bytes program. She seems to do much better at these things than I do, but that makes sense. Unlike yours truly, Carly is good looking and social. While we waited for Jeff Mullen (Who I had never officially met) to finish a cell call at the bar, Carly filled me in on what she has been doing since she and Pure Play Media parted ways. I also ran into Selena and Kent Silver at the bar. Why is it I only see them at gatherings? Is it possible that Selena and Kent are stalking me? (Kent maybe, but Selena? Keep dreaming.)

It is always interesting to meet someone for the first time after years of email contact. I’m not sure how long I’ve “known” Jeff Mullen, but it’s been quite a while. He introduced me to his partner, (Scott David) bought me a beer and told me all about the new projects with X-Play that they are working on. Their Britney Rears flick they are doing promises to be something that will catch enough mainstream press to really take off. Look for that to dominate the porn world for a while when it’s released later this winter. We were having a great conversation, but Jeff got distracted by Lily Thai (and who can blame him) so I finished the conversation with his Scott D. Lily looks amazing, isn’t back in the business and knows enough to remind me that I have given her great reviews in the past. (Well yeah.)

The two Scotts introduced me to Terri from www.thefloatingworld.com He is another guy I have had email conversations with for a long time, but never met. We both seemed equally uncomfortable in the big party setting, but had a nice conversation about sites over the blaring sounds of Poison, Kiss and The Human League. As we sat in a booth, Terri and I had a close encounter with Flower Tucci. For those of you who have only seen Flower in movies I have to say that she really does look amazing in person. She is a very busy woman and I am lucky enough to get to work with Flower and Maria once a week on the KSEX show. Once Flower left, Terri and decided to make our way to the patio to say hello and good night to the birthday girl.

As far as I know Terri made it back there all right, but I got sidetracked. Mari Possa was seated in a booth back on the patio and I had to say. This beautiful girl has come a long way since she was Seymore’s assistant and doing toy reviews for my site years ago. (I wonder which one of those things helped her more?) Her perky new(ish) rack was nicely on display and we were interrupted many times by adoring fans (of hers, not mine) and plenty of drunk guys looking to score. (Again, mostly with her.) As I was about to leave, April zipped past me on the way to the ladies room and asked me to wait to say good bye. That left with some time to kill and Mari kept me company. (And for the record, her sister and two friends were looking mighty fine.) I never did catch the name of the porn girl sitting next to Mari though. She looked very familiar.

I finally made my way back inside where April was surrounded by friends and enjoying herself immensely. (As truly wonderful people often are.) She gave me a great big hug and thanked me for coming. I think she knows me well enough to know that I don’t do the porn party thing that often and not for just anyone. I happen to think she is worth the drive and is one of my very favorite people, in or out of the business. I snapped a few pictures of her spectacular birthday outfit that I am sure you will all agree, suits her quite well. We posed for a few pictures together which just gave me the chance go hug her for too long and even do something I’ve been waiting years to do. (I’ll never tell.) Mark Davis came by at about the same time so he got into a few pictures with April. Though we have still never been formally introduced, I did get to watch him pick up April and do what might have been called Dirty Dancing in a time long, long ago. (Lucky Bastard)

So I said my final good byes (I think I got an extra few birthday hugs just for fun) and headed back home. If only traffic between H’Wood and OC were this light all the time. I might actually go to more events. No, probably not. It still takes a pretty big event or a pretty special person to pry me away from comfy chair. Luckily for me, April and her party make for just such an event and just such a person. Thanks for the invitation sweetheart and for a fun evening.