Kick Azz: A XXX Parody

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MOVIE TYPE: Parody
178 Mins.
Powersville
DIRECTOR: Dommy B
THEMES: Old Guys with Young Girls
2011
CONDOMS: None
STARS: Abella Anderson, Emma Heart, Ralph Long, Dommy B, Isis Taylor, Adam Woods, Esperanza Gomez, Jim Powers

REVIEW-

This movie is both entertaining and a complete fucking mess. It’s not a parody first of all. It has some dialog and costume play that might suggest something that might in an alternative universe resemble a stoned fantasy version of Kick Ass, but that’s being very generous. The special effects are beyond cheesy and would almost be charming if the rest of the movie had been even a meager attempt. Some of the scenes come from other movies and the whole thing looks like a wrap around mess. The dialog often seems like Ralph Long and Dommy B doing years-stale Kevin Smith dialog. It’s just a mess. So why do I say that it’s entertaining? Well, this is a porn flick after all. Some of the sex scenes are really good. Esperanza Gomez, Abella Anderson and Isis Taylor are fucking hot. Since they carry a good deal of the action we have plenty to enjoy. Isis and Abella star in one scene each. Their scenes are good examples of strokeable energy and eye candy. Isis is hot from head to toe and really shows off her ass beautifully. Esperanza shows up quite a few times. She does tease and solo and fucks twice. Her body is really hot and her sex scenes make all the stupid dialog mess worth sitting through. (Of course you can just skip them.) There are other scenes in the movie as well. They all seem to have been thrown in just to pad the running time and don’t really add much else. Overall Kick Azz is a movie with a great box cover, a hot cast and content that is better chopped up an sold as parts. The sex scenes with Isis, Abella and Esperanza are worth watching so VOD those or grab the DVD and be prepared to use the fast forward button a lot.

Abella Anderson & Ralph Long

Thinking back to their time as aspiring musicians, Ralph and Dommy remember when Abella Anderson broke down their door and tried to bust them. It doesn’t exactly make sense, but it gets us to the point where we get to see this sexy little brunette with her mouth on a hard cock and isn’t that the point anyway? She is quite cute and slips easily into 69 with Ralph. He gets behind her and fucks her pussy while she shows off her adorable little ass. As usual, she provides good energy to go with an ample amount of eye candy. I really like the way she rides a cock and reaches back to play with her asshole. This little firecracker puts on a great show and is the perfect little spinner for a big hard cock. The sound on the scene is a little odd, like you can almost hear the camera humming over her moans and occasional hot talk. He finishes her off with a shot on her face. Hot scene even if it doesn’t make a lot of sense.

Esperanza Gomez

After another odd ball discussion of porn, the guy swatch as Esperanza Gomez, clad in some super freaky socks and happily showing off her big tits, teases like crazy. She has great legs, a tight ass and as the clothes come off those tits are even more mouth watering. Hot solo here that switches over to an unrelated scene between Esperanza and some dude. (That I swear comes from another movie.) At any rate she is bent over with a finger inside of her tight pussy while the guy eats her asshole. The lovely Latina licks and then sucks his cock with great skill and a beautiful smile. She backs into his lap, spreading her asshole and loving every inch of cock. The reverse cowgirl action gives us a great look at her well trimmed bush and her strong thighs as she fucks him like a woman trying to get in her daily workout. Esperanza is a tall woman with a built-for-sex body and when her motor is running like it is here, she is a superb fantasy fuck. They finish this one up with a great shot o Esperanza on her knees jerking a big load of cum out of his cock and all over her face. She is very, very hot.

Alanah Rae & Ralph Long

The next scene just comes out of nowhere. It’s Ralph fucking busty blonde Alana with a “Booblube” logo in the corner. Are the guys watching free porn? Not sure, but it’s kind of a mess. It’s just a quick highlight reel of a scene that features her eating his load and looking lovely.

Emma Heart

So Kick Azz has a mentor, Big Dick and he’s an old bald dude who likes fucking hot chicks apparently. They throw in a scene with Emma Heart sucking his cock. She talks about how many girls he fucks and how his dick tastes like pussy. I don’t know what movie this one is from, but it’s definitely got that beauty and the beast theme going. Once she gets his modest member hard, he slips it into her tight pussy and lets her do her best to pretend that she loves it. There is a brief anal scene here as he bangs the tiny-titted young blonde. He busts his nut inside of her pussy, capping an odd, unrelated scene that will probably thrill some folks.

Isis Taylor & Ralph Long

Isis Taylor is a super heroine who busts up a kidnapping ring with a gun. (And some really silly special effects.) Apparently all that killing turns her on because Isis celebrates by rubbing off. Ralph comes home and gives her a short licking. In turn she opens her pretty mouth and starts sucking. I have seen Isis turn in perfect blowjobs, so his one is a little disappointing because she seems a bit bored. Ralph works his dick into her pussy and that wakes up the stunning beauty. He pushes her long legs up over her head and fucks that pretty pussy hard. When she turns over and shows off her ass, Isis starts talking dirty and looks back over her shoulder. She is great to look at and once the pace is picked up, Isis provides some of the hottest fucking in the movie. They finish up with a big messy shot all over her prefect tits. Is really would make a good super heroine. All she has to do is fuck the crime out of the city.

POV Smoking Girl

Some chick who isn’t in the credits and has pierced nipples delivers a POV blowjob while smoking. It’s another scene pulled from another source and it’s pretty low grade stuff. If you happen to be into smoking I am sure that this is the sort of thing you can’t get enough of. It totally bores me. The girl is kind of cute, but the picture quality is bad, she looks kind of bored and blows smoke all over his dick over and over. He ends up cuming on her face.

Random Finale

Another uncredited girl goes after the old dude in the finale. She is kind of cute, but fucks like she’s bored and there really isn’t anything to recommend here. To make matters worse, the scene slows down. After a quick BJ and first position I had hoped we would get out of this scene, but they settle in for a full length snooze fest. When he finally shoots his load in her mouth it is just way too late.

Esperanza Gomez & Ralph Long

When Kick Azz is tortured and his friend killed (In a pointless and too-long string of violent clips) Esperanza breaks him out and attacks his cock. She looks good slipping it into her mouth and brings back some energy to a movie the really needed it. Esperanza jerks him off and licks his balls like she’s ready to eat hi alive. Ralph rolls her over and slam fucks her horny pussy until his balls are slapping loudly on her cheeks. Great energy here and some really hot leg shots as she kicks her feet high in the air. When she rides him, Esperanza fucks hard enough to make the bed creak loudly. I love watching her squat fuck a she sticks out her chest and grinds on his dick. They finish up with a shot on her face. As Ralph fucks her tits, she actually lips her lips to get the cum off. Esperanza cleans up for a happy and hot ending.

Bonus: BTS, Bonus BJ (Nena Linda)

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