Hercules

MOVIE TYPE: Feature

130 Mins

Wicked
www.WickedPictures.com

DIRECTOR: Jonathan Morgan

THEMES: Comedy, Costume, Outdoor Sex

CONDOMS: Yes

2003

5/02

STARS: Julian Ann, Evan Stone, Randy Spears, Stephanie Swift, Sydnee Steele, Dee, Kaylynn, Gina Ryder, Zana, Lezley Zen, Kristal Summers, Holly Hollywood, Flick Shagwell, Ashley Blue, Fujiko Kano. Cherie, Joel Lawrence, Lee Stone, Ian Daniels, Alex Sanders, Pat Myne, Steve Hatcher & Billy Glide.

REVIEW-

When Wicked has a big time release, everyone knows it. They made this DVD a double disc release and sent out a huge press package to promote it. I’m trying to figure out how I missed it on VHS since I usually check out the Jonathan Morgan features, but at least I get to see it now. He’s probably the most decorated comedy director in the past decade. Morgan co-wrote this script (according to the credits) with script writer Martin Brimmer. The two have worked so well together in the past so I’m sure this one will be worth a few laughs. This is probably the kind of movie that Morgan would have made with Serenity in the lead a few years ago, but now he doesn’t have that luxury. Instead, Wicked has turned most of their contract girls loose in this one. Julia Ann, Evan Stone and Randy Spears have the leads and are joined by Stephanie, Sydnee and Lezley Zen. We’ve also got Mike Horner doing a “Masterpiece Theater” type host who is telling us the true story behind the legend of the mighty Hercules.

Julia Ann plays Hera, the chain smoking wife of Zeus who enjoys toying with mortals. Peasant Ian Daniels comes to her, begging for rain to save his family. She agrees to put in a good word for him if he does her a little favor. It’s a very good deal for Ian who gets right to work between her parted thighs. She returns the favor with a decent blowjob before taking his condom covered cock into her folds. He pushes her long legs back to get in deep. After some doggy, she spins around and lets him cum on her face. Not really a nice goddess, Hera turns him into a frog for his effort.

Hera’s greatest wrath is reserved for Hercules though. Less than thrilled by the fact that her man slummed it with a mortal, she ties to kill the offspring. When that doesn’t work, she puts a curse of insanity on him. Hercules falls out of favor with the gods and with humans. His only true friend is played by Randy Spears, a guy who is supposed to be a eunuch. Luckily for him he isn’t because it gives him a chance to bag sexy Dee. (Lucky for us as well I guess.) She gets down on her knees and gives him one hell of a nice blowjob. Dee is a woman every feature director should hire to make sure that at least one scene is really hot. Randy bends her over and lifts her dress up over her ass so he can take her from behind. Tossing the dress aside, she shows off her body during the reverse cowgirl. He gives her a big load of cream right on her pretty face.

To regain favor, Hercules has to complete his twelve labors. If he completes them, then he will become a god when he dies. These trials give Spears and Stone a chance to ham it up a bit, but take us through nearly fifteen minutes between sex scenes. I’ve got nothing against these sort of breaks, but it’s a relieve when Julia sends some wood nymphs to slow our heroes down. It still takes a while before Hercules actually puts the wood to the nymphs. (Gina Ryder and Cherie) After such a long wait, a less rushed double blowjob would have been nice, but we have to take what we can get. Gina does a good job riding his dick and takes her half of the wad quite nicely.

While recruiting warriors for his next mission, Hercules interviews Fujiko, a lovely Asian warrior with special skills. She can handle a blade, but is even better at taking on two men at once. Steve Hatcher and Pat Myne are easily pickings for this hungry cock beast. She bends over to suck one cock while the other penetrates her from behind. Hatcher is the first to part her big buns, but Myne also takes a trip up the tight back road. This scene is way too short, but has some good action and a nice facial finish. It’s easily the best of the movie.

The next task has Hercules taken parishioner while hunting the Amazons. Their queen, Sydnee Steele, nearly rapes Herc as soon as she gets him back to her home. Using some nice soft animal skin rugs as a bed, Hercules dives in and drives her crazy. After a short blowjob (A trend in this flick), she works through a few positions until she finds her comfort zone atop his rod. In porn, even queens take it on the face.

The rest of the men take part in an orgy with the Amazons. There isn’t much to recommend in this scene. With so much going on, the intentionally dim light and a lack of real heat, not even Zana and Flick Shagwell can save this scene from being more than space filler. If you like group scenes with a couples slant, then you might find this more interesting than I did.

Hera is getting desperate and calls on her old friend Hades. (Joel Lawrence) They have a three way dialog scene with Krystal Summers that is nicely done by all three performers. Eventually the two women get down and share his cock. The long break before this scene makes it very important for the heat to by high from the beginning. Julia does her best, but this just isn’t the strongest scene of the movie. Krystal makes things interesting during her reverse cowgirl, but the highlight of the scene is probably Julia taking from behind while bent over a rock. The facial isn’t shot very well so even the ending is a bit of a let down.

If you want real disappointment, look no further than the next scene. After descending into the depths of hell Spears gets to watch a three-way lesbian scene. Why is that disappointing? Because two of the hottest women in the cast, Stephanie Swift and Kaylynn, make their first and only appearance of the flick in this veggie fest. This closes out the sexual action for the movie. There is a very funny game show finish with Joel Lawrence, Julia Ann and Evan Stone handling some difficult and funny dialog perfectly.

I have somewhat mixed feelings about this movie. On the one hand, the script is tight and genuinely funny. It’s really well acted, especially by Julia Ann and Randy Spears. There are times in this movie when I forgot that I was watching porn and felt like I was in a screwball B-movie. That kind of quality is rare in an adult feature, but it’s a double-edged sword. Because there were times when I forgot that this was a porn movie, the sex really needed to be good to make up for the long gaps. More often than not, it comes up short. I know that features have a different rhythm to their sex scenes, but if feels like Morgan was just rushing through most of them to get to the next laugh. Dee and Fujiko provide the best sexual moments of the movie, with Julian Ann pitching in as well. I never expect blistering sex from an adult feature (Unless it’s a John Leslie or John Stagliano feature) but there are too many hot women in this cast to let the sex come up this flat. Hercules is one of the best sex comedies of the year, one of the better features of the year, but Morgan needs to remember that most of his audience still wants to get off as much as they want to laugh.

BONUS MATERIAL: There is a whole disc full of extras on this one. The behind the scenes featurette is nearly an hour long and shows us more than we could ever want to know about the making of an adult feature. An entire section is devoted to the pre-production, including auditions, rehearsals and other aspects of film making. We also get deleted scenes, alternate ending and a multi-version scene where we see Spears and Morgan give a number different takes. Morgan does a director’s diary that gives us a very personal look at what he went through on the set. There is a slickly cut piece on the girls of Hercules, a box cover shoot, an interview with Julia Ann, bloopers, the trailer and all of the usual Wicked promo material. This second disc could take you twice as long to watch as the feature so if you’re looking for a closer look at this feature, all of your bases are covered.