THE PIPELINE: SEPTEMBER 2003
It’s that time again boys and girls. You can feel the summer slipping away. It’s time to put away the industrial strength sunscreen and spark up the BBQ one last time. Football is upon us, it’s back to school time and the long cold winder is just around the corner. For those of you who are about to hit the books again, good luck. For the rest of us, welcome back to Pornology 101. Professor Pipe is ready to teach classes again and I expect you all to study hard. In addition to the core courses in “The Art of Gaping Anal”, “Feature Porn Sex: Why It Sucks” and “The Downfall of Modern Pornography: Tattoos, Double Anal & Suitcase Pimps”, here is a list of other classes that I highly recommend.
Journalism 101: Beer Bongs & Blowjobs.
As students return to campuses all across the nation, they should keep their eyes out for the Shane’s World crew. They will find it hard to avoid the “Campus Invasion” though as Rolling Stone has dedicated 4 pages to Shane’s World in their September 18th issue. RS sent a team to cover the first Campus Invasion and came back with a first hand account of every college guy’s dream, partying live with some of the hottest girls in porn. The story is bound to increase interest for further CI movies and just might give young men a reason to college even if the draft is not reinstated.
Geography 101: Sexy Fun Down Under
The girls (and guy) of Las Vegas Novelties made quite a splash at the Sydney Sexpo in Australia. LVNI contract stars Jewel De’Nyle and Ron Jeremy joined company owner and all-around hottie Serenity for the annual event. The show has been a permanent fixture on the LVNI schedule for over four years. Serenity comments, “Australia has been like a second home to me. The Sexpo is an event I look forward to throughout the year. As an Aussie business owner now, I look forward to showcasing our stars and products to the Australian public, not just LVNI but C & L (The exclusive distributor of LVNI products in Australia.)as well”
Business 101: Name Recognition is Key
Brand new video company Cherry Boxx Pictures is out of the gate quickly. During the same week they announced their first two releases, they also inked their first contract girl. Superstar Dayton will star in a dozen movies for Cherry Boxx, taking time off from her successful dance tour to make her first new movie in nearly two years. In addition to the features, Dayton will continue to dance and make a number of appearances to help the fledgling company get off the ground.
Public Relations 101: Always Leave Them Wanting More
The artist formerly known as Bisexual Britni has formally announced her retirement this month. In three years she starred in over 250 adult videos, became a contract girl and won numerous awards including the fan based Rog Reviews Fan Fave award as Best Female Performer in 2002. In her retirement announcement, Britni left the door open for a return. “My retirement from the adult video industry is not, however, absolute. Will I still, if invited, participate in movies with movie makers I really enjoy? Absolutely. If Max Hardcore, Rodney Moore, Jewel DeNyle and an additional select few, ask me to perform with/for them, I would surely accept their offer. So, do not be surprised when you see me in the occasional new release even though I am retired.” Said the pint-sized blonde. I don’t think we’ve seen the last of BB.
Public Relations 201: When They Really Want More, Give It To Them
Speaking of blondes making a comeback, Shay Sweet is up to her old tricks. The twenty-four year old blonde will make her return to the blue screen in “Exile” from Sin City. The movie will feature Shay performing with Kurt Lockwood and Julian in separate scenes. It will also feature Sin City Girl Aurora Snow and is directed by Skye Blue. Fans of the dangerously cute Ms. Sweet will enjoy seeing her with guys again after mostly performing in veggie scenes during the past few years.
Fashion Design 101: Even Ripped Leather Looks Good on Aurora
Since we’re talking about Aurora Snow, she’s got yet another thing to add to her ever-growing resume. With her video contract, toy contract, Playboy TV show and web site in place, Aurora has entered the world of fashion. She will do a shoot for Junker Designs, a company that specializes in distressed leather clothing. The custom pieces are hand-made and have been worn by such notables as Pink and Christina Aguilera. Now they will grace the perfection that is Aurora Snow.
Marketing 101: Saturate The Market
Pat Myne has been kicking around the adult industry for years. Last year he made the switch from talent to director and Metro has now made him an in-house director. The two-year deal calls for no less than eighty movies, making it one of the most prolific deals of its kind. “Pat lenses some of the nastiest sex ever put to video”, production director, Joey Wilson states. “I believe he is one of the top handful of directors turning out a real consumer driven product”. Myne will helm a number of lines for Metro’s new gonzo/wall to wall division, FuxXion including “American Ass”, “Terrible Teens” and “Ass Brand New”. Metro hopes that he will be able to help them compete with the likes of Evil Angel, Anabolic, Red Light District and other quality raincoater companies.
Politics 101: Vote For The Girl With Big Boobs Last month I joked about a porn star running in the recall election to replace Governor Gray Davis. Larry Flynt was already in the running, but Porn Valley added some much needed eye candy to the mix. Kick Ass contract girl Mary Carey is also running for the highest office in the state. Mary’s platform includes such revolutionary ideas as a porn-for-pistols program, taxation of breast implants and using her fellow porn performers at ambassadors of good will. She also promises to make lap dances tax-deductible and to wire the Governor’s mansion with web cams. On a serious note, Mary does support gay marriage, giving her a leg up on Arnold and the other candidates.
With another summer gone, it’s time for all those new porn girls who spent their post-graduation months fucking and sucking on camera to put away their pumps and lube so they can hit the books like good little college freshmen. Fear not porn fans, with the new school year comes a whole new crop of girls who will turn eighteen, graduate (or not) and take the first bus to Porn Valley where Vince Vouyer will snatch them up and give us our yearly fix of barely legal babes. In the meantime, bundle up and pray for a high drop out rate at colleges and in fry-pits all across this great land.
